The DeArranged Marriage
Hurlan's tangled heart gets tied up in more twists than a bag of pretzel sticks when he hears the international grunt of love.
The whole of Heartshe gets bitten in the dog by the hot wolf of American sexceptionalism.
yrotanalpxe-fles (Hold mirror up to this text, then to your own face. You have just confronted collective despair.)
One billion gods working inside three trillion universes couldn't possibly create a reality this stupid.