The Smith family forgets to celebrate Father's Day, and so to make it up to Stan, they plan out the perfect day. Stan uses a CIA device to erase their memories and have them continually plan perfect days for him.
Stan goes over-the-top to produce a reenactment of Charles Lindbergh's solo flight for Steve's school project after he gets an F. Klaus buys a pair of shoes online and Hayley helps him harass the neighbor they believe has stolen them.
Hayley takes Roger with her to a meditation center and he quickly takes over, becoming one of the world's leading authorities on meditation. Stan and Steve become apprentices as they are taught the art of making sushi.
Stan is embarrassed when a painting of Francine's genitals, done by a famous artist, is unveiled at the museum. Steve turns to helping people after masturbation is ruined by his mom's portrait.
When Roger breaks his ankle, Francine convinces Stan to let him play in his basketball league. Meanwhile, Steve sings a song that parodies R. Kelley's "Trapped in the Closet."
When Stan discovers a salt mine in the backyard, the Morton Salt Company wants to buy it. It turns out Steve is the rightful owner of the land and he faces pressure from the family to sell.
Stan brings President Garfield back to life in order to teach Hayley about history. Steve writes for the school newspaper.
When Bullock is upset that somebody did not bring a gift to the CIA Secret Santa party, Stan goes on a mission to find out who it was. Meanwhile, Steve poses as the good guy boyfriend of several female classmates.
Stan and Steve start bowling together to have more quality time and Steve gets discovered for his bowling talent. Klaus holds a contest to test whether Roger or Hayley have the worse attention span.
In order to avoid being sent on a suicide mission, Stan learns how to become a DJ to beat Bullock in a DJ Battle. Jeff takes up drinking psychedelic teas and Roger helps him build an imaginary musical instrument.
When her efforts to save the planet prove hopeless, Hayley decides that she might get more attention if she becomes a blonde. Meanwhile, Stan and Steve go on a mission to find a new home for the Smiths.
When Bullock sends a drone to do the job Stan and his colleagues are supposed to do, Stan is determined to prove that humans are better than robots. Meanwhile, Francine and the rest of the family participate in a slow motion race in the living room.
Steve and Snot are fed up with being bullied. When they enroll in a karate class, Snot is brainwashed by the sensei and it's Steve’s mission to get him back. Meanwhile, Klaus develops a horrible odor and is forced to be an outside pet.
When Francine's sister Gwen comes to town, Hayley suspects she is up to no good. Meanwhile, Stan teaches Steve the art of hugging Aunt Gwen and Klaus shadows Roger's dramatic comments.
When Steve insults Francine, she refuses to cook for him and he becomes a successful internet chef, appearing on a popular morning show. Meanwhile, Stan thinks he can make people invisible by snapping his fingers.
Hayley gets a job and starts to fall for a co-worker. Meanwhile, Stan chauffers Steve and Francine to a Mother-Son dance. Hayley is broke and gets an office job where she meets a cute co-worker named Ax. Klaus and Roger encourage her to have sex with Ax on an office retreat. Hayley is all for it until she finds out Ax is a married man. Hayley backs out when she sees he has a tattoo of Roger. Back at home, Stan steals Francine from Steve at the school dance and tries to make it up to him by letting them dance at home.
When Stan wishes he could have Principal Lewis' carefree, single life, his wish comes true! Meanwhile, in his wish world, Principal Lewis has Stan's family.
Hayley is dying to be on a roller derby team, but they will only let her play if her “sister” Steve will play too. Meanwhile, a magical carpenter visits Stan and Francine and Roger runs the roller rink.
Hayley is injured in a fire and while she is in the hospital she meets Millionaire Matt Davis. As Hayley and Matt fall in love, Steve discovers Jeff Fischer is still alive in outer space. Jeff and Hayley communicate via an old CB radio and Jeff asks Hayley to stay true to him while he finds a way back to Earth.
Greg and Terry decide to adopt a ten-year-old Russian boy named Michael. At a party celebrating the decision, Roger is jealous of Greg and Terry's fabulous lifestyle of culture and sophistication. Roger rejects the Smith family as trashy and impersonates Michael, successfully integrating into his new home.
Roger pushes himself to the breaking point by working non-stop at his dive bar. When he suffers a heart attack, Roger decides to sell the bar to a company that promises to continue his vision. Upon returning to visit, Roger sees that the dive bar has been completely remade as a family friendly restaurant.
Roger has been acting incredibly needy and clingy with the family. He senses something in the air that is affecting his behavior but he can't tell where its coming from. Roger leads Francine to a forest where they find a crashed alien ship, with the alien still alive.