Chawstafarianism isn't just a religion: it's a way of life.
The Comening the Comening the Comening the Comening the Comening the Comening the Comening the Comening, etc.
Witch sister'll win the Miss Heartshe crown: Hurshe or Hambrosia? Pageant judge Hurlan will try dying... or die trying!
Hambrosia teaches Doc that death is a gift, but Doc exchanges it for a thinly veiled metaphor concerning the complexities of the abortion debate.
Sometimes you just gotta get away from it all, in order to destroy the entirety of civilization.
When Boss Hoss Heartshe dies, who will inherit the town? The answer is a secret you can never know! (Answer: his secret son.)
Hambrosia and Hurshe use the greatest weapons of all time to get control of the holler: hand chops, doll-napping and murder.
Boss Hoss Heartshe decides its high time Hurlan, his head man-boy in charge cracks the nut of the town curse.
Sometimes low-class people require high-tech solutions. And the bible.
When Hurlan discovers that his calling is to be a doctor, his sister, Hurshe, takes advantage of his crotch generosity.
When a non-meddling non-reporter doesn't stick his nose where it doesn't belong, the holler goes on HIGH ALERT!
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