The Worst Stan
Stan arranges for Principal Lewis to marry Superintendent Riggs so he can finally be a best man at a wedding; Roger's new shorts attract the interest of Ricky Martin.
Stan uses an avatar of a hot girl to bond with Steve; Roger plots a violent end for frat brothers who stiffed him out of $20 for a limousine ride.
The Scarlett Getter
Francine is disgusted when Stan reestablishes contact with a crush from CIA boot camp; Bullock hires a bounty hunter to capture Roger; Steve wears Hayley's panties after concluding they bring him luck.
When a play about the life of Jesus Christ turns into a brutal battle between Stan and Roger, Stan is excommunicated from the Christian church; Hayley and Jeff adopt an infant son whom Stan believes is the Antichrist.
Stan's Best Friend
When Steve's new puppy is gravely injured, Stan attempts to save the dog using a doctor who specializes in alternative medicine.
Less Money, Mo' Problems
Stan bets Jeff and Hayley that he and Fran can live on minimum wage for one month; Roger and Steve test-drive a Ferrari after Klaus brags about having driven one.
The Kidney Stays in the Picture
When Hayley experiences kidney failure, Stan and Fran travel into the past to find the man who may be Hayley's real father.