Adult Swim: Celeb-Nerdy with China, IL's Brad Neely

It's true: Even celebrities with their barrel-aged whoopee cushions and designer joy buzzers are capable of being just a little bit nerdy like the rest of us. In Celeb-Nerdy we invite those fabulous, glamorous and luxurious individuals to let their freak flags fly high as they discuss their strangest fascinations. In this edition, we speak with Brad Neely, the creator of China, IL -- new episodes airing Sundays at midnight -- about his totally real philosophical fixation with Brad Pitt. Neely has coined the phrase "god substitute" to describe Pitt. You'd better just read this to understand what he means.

So what's with you and Brad Pitt?

I don't know. You always hear people talk about, "Okay, who's the biggest movie star in the land? Who's the golden boy? Who's the guy who makes the most money? Who's the biggest man?" It's always Brad Pitt. But whenever I think about his movies, he's never really the star. I mean, he is the biggest star, but he's not a lead, the focus, the guy that has to go through the trouble and figure things out. He's often the trouble. He's often the thing that bothers somebody in the movies. That just made me crazy to track him for a while now. [Laughs.]

But I think Moneyball may prove my theory wrong, or maybe now that he's getting older he figures he can be the person in the middle of the movie. It just strangely goes hand-in-hand with how I think a lot of males in my peer group see Brad Pitt in reality. Like, we think of him as super handsome and really rich and he's married to a lot of ladies that a lot of guys are attracted to. Like, "God, I wish I could be Brad Pitt!" I feel like that's the role that he plays in all his movies. He's that guy. He's Brad Pitt to some poor ass*** in all his movies. That makes me laugh.

When did you first notice this? When did it cross over from something you just noticed to something you have a philosophy about?

I noticed this first because I have it myself. I watch all movies, I watch trash. It's not weird for me to go out of my way to watch a Brad Pitt movie. If there's a movie with Brad Pitt in it, I'm going to see it just accidentally. I watch every movie with f***ing Kate Hudson in it. That's not a big deal. There's that. So this is just something that you keep noticing: The biggest movie star in America doesn't really star in movies.

“It's not weird for me to go out of my way to watch a Brad Pitt movie.”

I have this conversation and everyone immediately tries to punch holes in the theory. But that's cool because it's not a perfect science. For one, it's just the weirdest thing to talk about. I'm often around people who have subversive interests and counterculture -- more interesting things to talk about than Brad Pitt. [Laughs.] And I'm like, "You know what? Let's talk about Mr. & Mrs. Smith."

The earlier things he did when he was younger, like, did you ever see Johnny Suede, with the big hair and everything? It's worth watching. It's funny. But no one ever talks about it.

Brad Pitt as Johnny Suede

I feel like Thelma & Louise is the role that he continues to play: The undeniably handsome, romantic thing that the real lead in the movie has to deal with. Same with Kalifornia and True Romance. Okay, and then there's a side category to this. He's either this thing we've been talking about or just incidentally there: He's totally disconnected from the movie. Like the True Romance guy. But I'm rambling here. What are you thinking? Am I crazy?

Do most people think you're crazy when you talk about this? Or do they think you're crazy for calling Brad Pitt a "god substitute?"

That's what I'm talking about. If you think about Snatch and Fight Club and Meet Joe Black and The Devil's Own and Sleepers and 12 Monkeys and Legends Of The Fall especially, oh my God…Troy? He played Achilles, for Christ's sake. The Assassination Of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford especially. The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button especially. Inglourious Basterds certainly. Tree Of Life is the epitome of it. The "god substitute" is what I'm talking about where everyone in the movie, instead of dealing with God, is dealing with Brad Pitt. [Laughs.] "Brad Pitt is in my life and he knows everything about me, and he knows that I'm not as good as him, and I'm having a hard time with my life because I want to either best him or be as good as him or overcome him." Which is pretty much everyone's relationship with God. It's true. I'm not just trying to be silly.

“The "god substitute" is what I'm talking about where everyone in the movie, instead of dealing with God, is dealing with Brad Pitt. ”

In Benjamin Button, it's Cate Blanchett's movie. She's dealing with this guy -- it's not just a role he picks, but it's the way he robotically sleepwalks through them like this perfect mannequin, turning his head, looking at them, acting like he doesn't know what food is. In Joe Black, he's eating peanut butter for the first time and is like, "What is this thing that you humans eat?" I mean, the funny thing, and the reason this is even worth talking about is that this must be intentional, right?

Meet Joe Black Peanut Butter Scene

I mean, you're looking at the career of a huge guy. This guy could be in any movie. All he has to do is call someone up and they'll put him in it. But he picks all of these micro parts and it's gotta be intentional. I would love it, I would love to be able to know if he's doing it intentionally.

If you think it's intentional, what do you think his intentions are? What is he trying to tell us?

I think it self-perpetuates that myth in real life where we're a bunch of guys feeling bad about not keeping the weight off and not looking like Brad Pitt in real life. Let me back up. The way I think about movies is a little different. They're these vehicles for getting an idea across and that's pretty much it. A bunch of ideas.

I think Brad Pitt thinks his job is to be an actor and he wants this job forever. He wants to be important. I'm putting all these words in Brad Pitt's mouth, but I do think he's in important movies. I'm not trying to undervalue these things. I do like movies and I like him. Obviously he likes people like Redford and Newman, those kind of American filmmaker/actor guys who aren't just waltzing in and doing the role and walking off. He's obviously somebody who's interested in what the movies are and what the ideas are. I'm thinking that someone who's that smart isn't randomly winding up in movies that are self-reflexive to his position in the actual natural universe where people are envious of him. In the real world, people are envious of Brad Pitt. In movies, the other characters are envious of Brad Pitt. [Laughs.] It's remarkable. It would be like if in every movie Mel Gibson was a bigoted ass****. In every movie you see that, so it like, actually reflects how we see him in the real world.

“In the real world, people are envious of Brad Pitt. In movies, the other characters are envious of Brad Pitt.”

Does this only apply to movies he's done, or do you feel this way about TV stuff he's done as well?

Oh, I don't know anything about television. [Laughs.] I don't know anything about that stuff. The other side is there's this role we're talking about as the god substitute, but if you look at Ocean's Eleven, Babel, and Mr. & Mrs. Smith, and The Mexican, these are movies where he's just sharing billing with other huge stars and there isn't a direct focus. It's like an ensemble cast.

Often he'll do the one where he's usurping -- "I'm the new you." In Spy Games he's that. In The Devil's Own with Harrison Ford and Robert Redford, he's that. They're both giving him their old throne in that movie. [Laughs.]

How did all these theories originate?

I don't know. It came into conversations and I guess whenever I was trying to write stories myself, thinking about, "Okay, you put this guy in the middle and this lady in the middle and you have all the other characters support that story." Once I started needing to break down what storytelling was, it's hard to not have that critical pair of glasses on when you're looking at finished movies. So then, you're watching Troy and you're like, "Holy s***! He's playing Achilles now. That has to be the eighth time -- and Achilles is a man-God." [Laughs.]

Troy Trailer (Rated R)

Now, he comes from Missouri, I think, and I come from northern Arkansas. We share the Ozarks. There may be that where I think, "Okay, he's a guy from the middle of America who came out to Hollywood and became Jesus." [Laughs.] That's fine. You kinda think, "Well, he's countryman to me." I'm just throwing it out there, just self-analysis or something. Maybe I'm narcissistically interested because we have a few things in common. Our name is Brad.

I noticed that instantly.

You might wanna scratch that down. [Laughs.] I don't know. It just keeps coming so I can't put it down. It's like you live in the neighborhood and you think that the guy across the street is into some weird thing, and you just keep seeing evidence of it. "He's bringing home another pony!" [Laughs.] "A Shetland pony! I don't know where they're going!" It'd be one thing if there was just three, but I think right around Fight Club and Snatch [I couldn't not see that he] f***s up everyone's movie.