• 5.
    The reason Gargamel's Smurf dinner tastes crappy is that he didn't pull off their clothes first. That's just shoddy prep work.
  • 4.
    History hasn't been this homoerotic since Patrick Swayze rode a horse in "North and South."
  • 3.
    A gummy bear's hangnails probably never heal.
  • 2.
    Bringing even more credence to the declaration: Bob Barker could make cutting off the balls of a Panda seem charming.
  • 1.
    Anything that can work in the violent deaths of Mrs. Garrett, Mork, and Capt. Stubing has to be the number one sketch.