How do we celebrate Valentine's Day here at Adult Swim? Well, that's easy: with pink cupcakes, a secret cupid card exchange, a sacrificial lamb slaughtering, the Sexual Inadequacies Crossfire Challenge, a vote for Least Likely To Find a Soul Mate, a vote for Least Likely to Have a Soul, the I'll Die Alone Costume Contest, Super-Soaker Bile Tag, a good cry, mutual disgust, and group therapy. Come join us, won't you?

• 5.

  Aqua Teen - Carl and Pornography

  It's disheartening to see a love as strong as this destroyed by financial stress.
  
• 4.

  Family Guy - Peter and Smuckers

  Love can be found everywhere you look. So make sure you look very carefully before you eat anything.
  
• 3.

  Aqua Teen - Carl and His High School Year Book

  Ah, bachelorhood. Security and companionship are not enough for a man like Carl to give up such a satisfying and beautiful adventure as this.
  
• 2.

  Tim and Eric - Mr. Henderson and Carol

  When you dare to love, you're putting yourself out there. It can be embarrassing and confusing. And Larry may threaten to cut you into little pieces.
  
• 1.

  The Venture Bros. - Brock and Molotov

  A romance with all of the classic elements: laser Zeppelin in Akron, a dump truck full of circus peanuts, a vicious ass-kicking and masturbating in a hotel.
  

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